Tuesday, March 9, 2010

On pins and needles

Sometime in the mid 90's my best friend dropped me like a hot potato. She and my sister had found themselves on opposite sides of a business deal gone bad and she had asked me to intervene on her behalf. And I refused to get into the middle of it. I wasn't living in the same town as them, I had no idea what had gone on and I did not want to have to choose sides. I stayed neutral. Or maybe to my BF it seemed as though I'd chosen my sister's side. I don't know... what I do know is that after things resolved on the business side, she never talked to me again.

Occasionally I'd make an effort to contact her, but at the time of the incident she was single. I have never been sure what her last name is. She might have continued to use her married name, gone back to her maiden name, or heck.. remarried since I'd last spoken with her. Her mom and dad had moved away from the last known address I had for them.. and the friends that we had in high school hadn't heard from her either. It was as though she elected to walk away from everything and everyone from Phoenix.

Well.. through a series of backdoor searches I found her facebook page Sunday night. Of course most things are kind of guarded, but from what I could see.. it looks as though things have gone well for her. She has remarried and she looks really happy in her profile picture. I took a chance and I sent a brief message to her. Didn't ask to be her friend on facebook... actually wrote a message to her to which I hope she eventually responds. I am trying not to read into the fact that I haven't gotten a response yet. I know on a normal day I don't get on my facebook all the time either.

But I'm anxious. I have missed her so much over the years and have never truly understood why I was "kicked to the curb." I believe in an identical reverse situation, she'd have stayed neutral as well rather than get between her sister and I. And I would have respected that decision. Well.. at least I think I would have eventually understood. So.. that's what I'm hoping for.. that enough years have gone by that we might be able to be friends again.


Toon said...

I've been on both sides of this situation -- yours and hers. And when I was the person who walked away from a friendship, I was very embarrassed about it later. Maybe she's ashamed of her behavior and doesn't want to own up to it just yet.

Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

Hope you hear something soon.